figuring it out as you go . . .

One of the first blogs I fell in love with was "A Cup of Jo" by Joanna Goddard.  She writes wonderfully, loves completely and let's us see her vulnerability.  I feel like she is one of those friends you have had since grade school . . . you know the ones.

 

A few weeks back I saved this quote from her blog; it is her husbands response to a having a happy marriage . . .

Here's what he told me this morning: "The secret to a long and happy marriage is not the idea that nothing bad is ever going to happen. But it's that when something bad happens, you know how to get through it together. One of the most important things is that when you're having an argument, instead of ratcheting up the emotion, you diffuse it. In the middle of a fight, say, "I love you; you're the most important person in the world to me," even if at that moment, those words are the hardest ones to choke out because you're so mad. It reminds you both of the big picture. It doesn't make it instantly better, but it takes it down a notch. And in the cool-down period afterward, you're not left questioning. You know everything is going to be ok. Half an hour after the fight, it's over and you feel good."

 

I think this is a wonderful and refreshing skill . . . I really want to try it . . .

 

 

She also recommended this article and it is a fantastic read; down to earth and realistic.  I think all couples should read this (ahem you too Mr. Hotpants) . . . . have you noticed that everything worthwhile requires hard work and dedication?  Your marriage deserves the exact same commitment.